The Journey

"We were made for something greater, but often it takes a journey to discover what that is."
-C.S. Lewis

So I've been home now for a little over a week. I wish I could say that I've had time to totally sit down and process, but the reality of it is that I've hit the ground running hard since the day I got back. (started back at work fulltime the Monday after I arrived home. Woohoo for the Lord's day of rest otherwise I might have croaked!!) But as I sit here and think about it now, I really have had a lot of time to "debrief" by just sharing my story with others. Here are just a few of the things God has shown me this summer... (ps- the list will probably grow and change as I think of more.. I'll just update the post).

• The Lord is ALWAYS faithful... even when the opposition seems tough, the timing all wrong, the circumstances to grave, the money to tight, the days too dark... He is there. A refuge and a strong tower. It took me quitting my job and jumping into the unknown to really understand this, but now I have such a clearer picture of his faithfulness and despite the stress and uncertainty, I'm glad I had to go through what I did to get here.
• I thought when I came to Focus that God wanted me to totally change the direction of where my life was headed. Maybe I was supposed to go into the mission field, maybe I was supposed to find a new job out in Colorado, maybe this, maybe that... but when it was all said and done, I realized that God had affirmed the direction I was already headed. I missed doing the graphic design stuff, and just being creative. Yeah-- I think I might just have picked the right career field after all ;-)
• I found out that there's nothing wrong with being a "golden retriever" and God's still going to do great things with and through my life using my UNIQUE personality. For some reason I had just bought into the lie that only people who are really outgoing and huge out-there leaders could really be effective for Christ. I tried squeeze myself into that mold and didn't fit AT ALL!! It was uncomfortable for me and really stressed me out. Here I was, the pastors kid, and I hate being in front of groups, leading things and all the stuff that pastors kids get "roped" into. It was even harder because my sister is great at all that stuff, so people just expected that I would be too. But I've seen that God can use whatever He has given you for His glory. I'm looking forward to how i can bless others by spending one-on-one time with them and working behind the scenes (even if I personally get no glory.. cause it's NOT about me). All I can say about this one is what a relief!
• In life you go through many different "seasons." Some of these seasons are really long and some are short. Some are difficult and some are easy. When you understand that this is just the way life is, it can really lift a huge burden off your shoulders! I used to totally stress out because I didn't have a "five year plan", but you know what? I really don't have to have a long term plan if I'm willing to surrender my life to God and just let Him be in charge. I can live from season to season knowing that He will provide. And that makes me EXCITED! Who cares what I'm going to do in 5 years... I'm happy with what life is NOW... and when this "season" is over, I'm ready to embrace the next one. If you are in a season of suffering right now, take heart... God is probably using this season to do something in your life--whether it be strengthen your character, teach you that you cannot rely on only yourself, help grow you in your faith, or even just let others help you.
• I guess that leads me to this lesson: It's OK to let others serve YOU sometimes! I think I let my pride get in the way a lot, even when I tell myself "You are just trying to be humble"." Be careful that you don't mix up humility with pride! It's easier to do than you might think! I learned that it can really be a blessing to let others minister to you, and it can be so refreshing to the spirit as well. I think Satan really gets us all jumbled up on this point... and it's pretty sad.
• BIG thing that God really smacked me with this summer is-- IT'S OK TO THINK & ASK QUESTIONS!!! (see earlier blog for more input) I'm done letting other people think for me. As Christians we need to be ready to engage with the world, and to be able to keep "in shape" we need to constantly be asking questions and not settle for just having the answers to life "feed" to us. Don't just take people's word at face value... even people you really admire and trust. They are only human too!! Filter everything through scripture. Some things will get "stuck" in the filter, but usually these are impurities that shouldn't be there anyway, or will hurt you. Read good books... Christian and others. If you want to learn about something it's good to have a few resources... and some different perspectives/viewpoints AREN'T bad... as long as you keep using the "scripture" filter. Talk with people. Really BE interested in their lives and what they think. Don't just shut them down because they believe differently. And don't freak out because you have doubts. IT'S OK TO DOUBT! As long as you just keep searching. Christians in todays world have for TOO long shut off their brains. It's time to take them BACK!
• Life is a journey. Enjoy the ride..... and have fun sharing in the journey with others.
  

When it all comes down to it... God is Good, and I just feel so blessed to be alive. May God bless you as you strive to do His will and keep on running the race called life. Times will be good and bad, and sometimes you will feel like you are running 120 mph. but you will make it... just never forget to pause at times and enjoy the view.